Win a free trip
I LOVE YOU Send this msg to 10 girls n win a free trip to Ur nearest police station in luxury jeep Rahena Khana and body masaaz free. U will surely like it.
Drive main karungi
Wife: Chalo na car me kahin ghumne chalte hai, aur car me drive karungi. Huband: Agar tum car drive karogi to jayenge car me, ayenge akhbaar me…
Mera paisa nikal
Thief with knife: Tera paisa nikal! Man: Do you know who I am? I am a corporator. Thief: Acchha? To phir MERA paisa nikal!
Rough copy before final copy
Why were males created before females? Coz you always need a rough draft before the final copy.
Who is the Ravan
Ravan had 20 eyes but he sighted only one woman… You have only 2 eyes but you sight every woman… Now who is Ravan?
Bhikari and kanjoos
Bikhari: 50 paise de de re baba maine 3 din se khana nahin khaya hai… Kanjoos: 50 paise nahi, 10 rupaye dunga, pahele ye bata 50 paise mein khana kahan milta hai.
Khilone chhupa do
Boy: Mom, aaj mera dost ghar aa raha hai… ghar ke sab khilone chhupa do Mom: Tera dost chor hai kya? Boy: Nahin, woh apne khilone pehchan lega.
Customer and Waiter
Customer: Waiter, there’s a fly in my soup. Waiter: That’s all right sir, he won’t drink much.
Then make a place
Hi, Doing nothing? Then make a place, 4 Me in ur heart!! I may come there any time! Ur’s faithfully, “Heart Attack”
When things go wrong
When things go wrong, When sadness fills your heart, When tears flow in your eyes, Always remember 3 things: 1) I am with you 2) You have money 3) Bar is open, Lets go.
I Miss you a Lot Dear
I Miss you a Lot Dear…. SENDER: Aishwarya Rai +919542496632 Message centre: +919540099996 ” Don’t get excited. She sent It to me.”
If U need ADVICE
If U need ADVICE, MSG ME. If U need a FRIEND, CALL ME. If U need HELP, E-MAIL ME. If U need MONEY, The number U dialed is not in service, Plz don’t try again.
A law permit
Q: Why doesn’t law permit a man to marry a second woman? A: Because as per law you cannot be punished twice for the same offense!
Bachelor’s schedule…
Monday ko dosti, Tuesday ko pyar, Wednesday ko shaadi, Thursday ko barbadi, Friday ko fighting, Saturday ko talaq, Sunday ko rest, Monday ko phir se talash.
Don’t take any chances
Man receives telegram: Wife dead-should be buried or cremated? Man: Don’t take any chances. Burn the body and bury the ash.
Aare o sambha!
Gabbar: Aare o sambha! yeh sms padhnewala insaan hai ki bandar? Samba: Sarkar agar reply kare toh insaan nahi toh bandar.
Way of Transferring
– There is a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. – It’s called marriage.
Grilfriend made me a begger
Beggar: Sir plz give me rs. 6 For coffee. Man: Coffee? Its rs. 3 only. Beggar: 1 for my girlfriend! Man: Wow! you too made a girlfriend? Beggar: No sir, girlfriend made me a begger.
Today is our anniversary
– Wife: Darling today is our anniversary, what should we do? – Husband: Let us stand in silence for 2 minutes.
In the exam hall
Examiner : Why you wrote the formula in your hand. Student : Because my teacher told, “Formulas must be in finger tips”.
Where do you want to go on our anniversary?
I asked my wife, “Where do you want to go on our anniversary?” She said, “Somewhere I have never been!” I told her, “How about the kitchen?”
Where do you want to go on our anniversary?
I asked my wife, “Where do you want to go on our anniversary?” She said, “Somewhere I have never been!” I told her, “How about the kitchen?”
All about marriage
Ek American nai ek Swami se bola, Hamare yaha shaadi e-mail se bhi hoti hai. Is par Swami bola kamal hai, Hamare yaha to sirf female se hoti hai.
Weight kitna hai
Dr: Apka weight kitna hai? Patient: Chashme ke sath 75 kgs. Dr: Aur bina chashme ke? Patient: Woh bina chasme ke toh mujhe dikhta hi nahi.
Chand mat kahiye
Laloo – Rabri tum meri CHAND ho Rabri – Na ji hamko CHAND-VAND mat kahiye, Yeh sasura America wale roz chand par chadhte hai.
Yeh student ki pehchan ha
Yeh student ki pehchan hai Haath mein cigratte mu mein pan hai Mashoor yeh shaitan hai Yeh student ki pehchan hai Parhna isey aata nahi Class kabhi jata nahi Canteen iss ki jaan hai Yeh student ki pehchan hai Jalson mein sab se aage hain Naron mein sab se aagey…
Drink beer with chicken fry…
Next generation child will sing: Twinkle twinkle little star, I just went to royal bar, Whisky rates are up so high, So drink beer with chicken fry.
Kuch nahi hua tha
Year 1963 – – – Aug 3rd – – – Evening, 07:48 – – – Uss waqt kuch nahi hua tha. Chalo apna kaam karo! Sara din sms padte rahte ho!!
Dost tu bhi sms likha kar
Dost tu bhi sms likha kar tera bhi naam ho jayega. Jab tujh par pheken ge log ande aur tamatar toh sham ki sabzi ka intezam ho jayega!
Category: Funny SMS
Funny SMS messages collection in English (New/Free/Short/Best)