Paani mein kuch gadbad hai
Paani mein Whiskey milao toh nasha chadta hai, Paani mein Rum milao toh nasha chadta hai, Paani mein Brandy milao toh nasha chadta hai, Saala paani mein hi kuch gadbad hai.
Yeh haath mujhe de de
When I go wrong, I need ur hand 2 correct, When emotions bust out, I need ur hand 2 catch, wen I win, I need ur hand 2 pat. In short: Yeh Haath Mujhe De De Thakur
How Can I?
Wife: Our new neighbour always kisses his wife when he goes to work, why don’t you do that? Husband: How can I? I don’t even know her.
Mujhe kitna pyaar karte ho
Girl: I love u. Boy: Me too. Girl: Kitna karte ho. Boy: Jitna tum mujhe karti ho. Girl: Kamine, main sochti thi ki tum sachha pyaar karte ho!
Dilne kaha dildar nikle
Khidki khuli zulfein bikhri Dilne kaha dildar nikle Par hai re meri footi kismat Nahaya hua sardar nikla.
Devdas at beer bar
Aaj didar, Kal yaar, Parso Pyaar, Phir ekrar, Phir intezar, Phir takrar, Phir darar, Sari mehnat bekar, or Aakhir mein ek or Devdas at beer bar.
Jab mai engineer tha
Plumber:- Sir pipe naya laga dia hai aur bill Rs.700/- ho gaya. Engineer:- Are itna tu main engineer ho ke bhi nahin kamata Plumber:- Main bhi nahi kamata tha jab engineer tha!!
Pledge of boys
Pledge Of Boys: India is my nation, girls r my destination, dating is my occupation, flirting is my profession, what the hell is this education?
I will not throw paper airplanes in class…
A boy caught in class throwing paper aero planes… teacher gave him punishment to write 5000 times “I will not throw paper aeroplanes in class.” and submit it tomorrow. Next day, he submitted the paper written #include #include void main( ) { clrscr( ); int cnt; for( cnt=1;cnt
Dar lagta hai
Wife to husband:- Tum bahar jate ho toh hamesha darr laga rehta hai Husband:- Don’t worry jaldi aajaunga. Wife:- Tumhari issi baat ka toh darr laga rehta hai
Wrestling with a pig in mud
Arguing with ur wife is like wrestling with a pig in mud, After sometime u realise that u r getting dirty & pig is enjoying it.
He came at night
He came at night, Explored my body, Got on top of me, Touched me, He bit, sucked swallowed & When he was satisfied He left, i was hurt, Bloody mosquito!
To be honest….
A man saw 3 parrots for sale. He was shocked by abnormally high prices. The owner says, “the first parrot can run ms office. Price 10 thousand.” “Other parrot for 15 thousnd, A programmer.” The last parrot carried a tag of Rs.50 thousand. What does he do? Owner replies: to…
Bibi par essay
Bibi ghar ki rasoi mein payi jane wali ek faltu musibat hai Iska paustik aahar pati ka bheja khana hai aur Yeh pani kam khoon jyada peete hai.
Teri aawaz
Teri aawaz sunne ko jab hum taras jate hai, Toh hum ghise pite C.D. zabardasti chala lete hai.
I close my eyes
Boy: I hate to see a girl standing in a bus when I am comfortably seated. Girl: So what do you do? Boy: I close my eyes.
Apni saas lagti hai
Jab jab hume pyaas lagati hai, Unke aane ki aas lagti hai, Unki diwangi mein hum ho gaye itne diwane ki, Har ladaki ki maa apni saas lagti hai.
Saach aur Veham
Teacher : Saach aur Veham main kiya farak hai? Boy : Aap hum ko padha rahi hain ye SAACH hai. Aur hum padh rahe hain ye aap ka VEHAM hai.
“DRIVE SLOW”
– There is always a “DRIVE SLOW” board near boy’s schools, but not near girl’s college.Why? – COZ vehicles automatically go slow.
Hamar rom-rom khil jawat hai
Tohar sms jab awat hai, Hamar rom-rom khil jawat hai. Badan ma gudgudi howat hai. Eema tohar sms ka kouno kasur naahi, Woh to hamar phoneva ka vibrator on hojawat hai.
True bravery
True bravery is to arrive home Fully drunk… A late night out… And mom waiting with a jhadu(broom) And u ask: “Hey mom, abhi tak safai kar rahi ho.”
Mobile hai?
Ek bacha paida hotay hi nurse say bola: Mobile hai? Nurse: Kya karo gay? Bacha: GOD ko miss call deni hay kye khariat say pohanch gaya.
Don’t think that U are in Love…
When words are not enough to express Ur Feelings Don’t think that U are in Love. It means that U need to improve Ur VOCABULARY..!!
Physics would have been much easier..
Physics would have been much easier.. if… if.. If.. “Tree” had fallen on Newton’s head instead of Apple..
The new scooty
Manager: When do u buy this scooty. Staff: Yesterday when I was standing in the bus station at night a girl came in scooty, stopped in front of me and said sit and took me in the dark place where she took of her clothes and said take whatever u…
Sms karenge tumhe bhari bhari
Sms karenge tumhe bhari bhari, Ye rasam lagati hai hume badi pyaari, Ye sms milte hi sms karo, Kyonki hume pasand nahi sms ki udhari!!!!!!
Kiss me…
Once a boy & a girl were playing ludo. Boy: If dice shows 1,2 & 3 I will kiss u. Girl: And if 4,5 & 6, Boy: Then u kiss me.
Sardar and doctor
Sardar on phone “Doctor my wife is pergnant.She is having pain right now”. Doctor: Is this her first child? Sardar: No this is her husband speaking…
Saari umar watchman
Evolution of man: Without shaadi Spiderman Shaadi ke din superman Shaadi ke baad Gentleman Aur B.V khobsurat ho toh saari umar watchman.
Girlfriends r like chocolates
Girlfriends r like chocolates, taste good anytime. Lovers r like PIZZAS, Hot n spicy, eaten frequently. Wives r like Dal RICE, eaten when there’s no choice.
Category: Funny SMS
Funny SMS messages collection in English (New/Free/Short/Best)