Young girl praying
Young girl praying : Please God marry me with intelligent man. God replied : Thats impossible, because intelligent men don’t get married.
Thanks for the warning!
A girl says to her boyfriend, One kiss and I’ll be yours forever. The guy says, thanks for the warning!
What virtue would it be?
Teacher : Now children, if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped him, what virtue would I be showing? Student : Brotherly love.
Tell me how this happened?
1 man asked to other, “a man died while drinking a milk, tell me how this happened?” Other man replied, “it would be poisonous milk.” The man said, “No”. Ok, I tell U, “abay yaar bhains uss per baith gai thi”.
Why are U so lazy?
Wife : Why are U so lazy? Husband : Cuz I cannot sleep properly in tonight. Wife : Why??? Husband : I was with you in my dream!
Want true love?
True Love is like a pillow. U could HUG it when Ur in trouble. U could CRY on it when Ur in pain. U could EMBRACE it when Ur happy. Want True Love? Spend Rs50 buy a Pillow.
Only 36 Legs
Question : There are 10 elephants swimming in a pond. A boy jumps inside and swims underneath them and counts the number of legs. There are only 36 legs. How??? Answer : One elephant was swimming Backstroke!!!
Saala is kal-kal ke chakkar
Bhikhari : Saab 1 rupaya de do. Saheb : Kal aana. Bhikhari : Saala is kal-kal ke chakkar mein is colony mein mere lakhon Rupaye fase huye hain.
Wat is de longest word…
Wat is de longest word in de english language? SMILES-bcoz dere is a mile betwen da first n last letters 😀 Who sits on babies? A babysitter:D Wat starts wid a T,ends with a T, n is full of T? A teapot:D Wat is de richest kind of air? MillionAIRe:D…
Kuch ho gaya hai
Exam ke 4 din pehle syllabus dekha to yaad aaya, Kuch to hua hai kuch ho gaya hai. Exam ke din paper dekh kar yaad aaya, Sab kuch alag hai, ab kuch naya hai.
Give an example…
A teacher teaching ALJEBRA: If x=y & y=z it means x=z. Give an example. STUDENT: Sir, i Love u & u love ur daughter it means “i love ur daughter”
Similarity between Gandhiji & Mallika…
Similarity between Gandhiji & Mallika… Dono NE kapde tyag diye, Ek NE desh ke liye, Doosre NE Deshwasion ke liye!
Generation Gap
1980 girls : Maa mei Jeans pehanungi Maa : Nahin beti log kya kahengey ? 2006 girls : Maa mein mini skirt pehanungi Maa : Pehen Le beti kuch to pehan Le!
Elephant luv with an ant
An elephant falls in luv with an ant. But ant’s parents are against their marriage. Guess why? They gave a solid reason: **Ladke k dat bahar hai**
Maine puchha chand se
Maine puchha chand se “dekha hai kahin mere yaar sa hasin” Chand ne kaha “saale itni uppar se kuch dikhta hai kya?”.
Let me see…
Father to son after exam : Let me see your report card. Son : My friend just borrowed it. He wants to scare his parents.
Terrorists have kidnapped
Terrorists have kidnapped our lecturers, And demanded of 500000 rs or else, They will burn them with kerosene, Plz donate. I have donated 15 litres.
Let me try
Once God came up 2 me & granted me a wish. I asked 4 “world peace”. “That’s impossible”, he said. Then I asked him 2 give U brain. He said “Let me try world peace”
yeh aadat kahan se lag gai…
Whenever u feel to study.. go into ur room.. just sit down.. relax, take a deep breath.. slap urself and say: “yeh aadat kahan se lag gai” ;-).
Bachelor’s Prayer
Radhey radhey,kudi fasadey Hare murari,miley kuvari Jai hanuman,pat ja meri jaan Wahe guru da khalsa,ek soni kudi di lalsa.
Tute huye dil se pyaar
Boy : Janeman! tute huye dil se pyaar karogi ya dil tutne tak pyaar karogi. Girl : Harmkhor! tuti huyi chappal se pitega ya chappal tutne tak pitega.
Meri bhi yahi dua hai
Wife : Kaash main newspaper hoti dinbhar tumhare hathon main rehti. Husband : Meri bhi yahi dua hai rab se issi bahane har din nayi nayi to milti.
Differences
– It’s funny when people discuss Love Marriage Vs Arranged Marriage. – It’s like asking someone, if suicide is better or being murdered.
Height of Kanjoosi
Height of Kanjoosi: A Bania’s house has caught fire & he is giving missed calls to the Fire brigade!
Husband and wife are like tyres
Husband and wife r like two tyres of a vehicle. If one punctures, the vehicle can’t move further. So intelligent men always carry a stepny with them.
Kya kar rahe ho?
Wife : Kya kar rahe ho? Man : Makkhiya maar rha hu. Wife : Kitni mari? Man : 3 male aur 2 female. Wife : Kaise malum? Man : Kyonki 3 daru ki botal se chipki thi or 2 phone se…
I was a fool
After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, “you Know, i was a fool when i married you.” The husband replied, “yes, dear, but i was in love And didn’t notice.”
Dont believe on Money…
Dont believe on money, Bcoz it gives bed but not sleep, It gives books but not mind, It gives luxries but not happiness, So Transfer it into my account.
The most outstanding object
Human brain is the most outstanding object in world. It functions 24 hrs a day, 365 days a year. It functions right from the time we are born, And stop only when we enter the examination hall.
Having two girlfriends
A Solid reason for having two girlfriends at one time : Monopoly is always damaging & Competition improves service!
Top 30 Best & Latest Funny SMS collection
Funny SMS messages collection in English (New/Free/Short/Best)
