Sardar and Beta
Sardar : Apne bete se bola, Bevakuf…kaisa machis leke aaya hai, ek bhi tili nahin jalti. Beta : Kya baat karte ho papa, sab tili test karke laya hu.
Adult joke
A blond was asked, what is a adult joke? Reply came any joke which is eighteen years old.
Nitrates
In chemistry class teacher asked a gal What r Nitrates? Gal answered shyly: Night rates, they are costlier than day.
Pay the bill
I would love to take u for dinner, Make u sit beside the candle, Shower u with roses and utter those 3 magical words in your ear… “Pay the bill”
bharat se sabse bada confusion ?
Bharat Ka Sabse Bada Confusion Ka Din Kaun Sa Hoga ? Socho………… Socho………. Nahi Maloom…………..!!!! Jis Din Raksa Bandhan Aur Friendship Day Ek Saath Padega !!!!
Perfect Example Of Confidence
A trainee in a big multinational companay, dialed C.E.O. by mistake and said: “hey send a hot cofee in accounts deptt, in 2 mins”. C.E.O. shouted: “Do U know with whom U arE talking ?” Trainee : “No.” C.E.O: “I am C.E.O. of the company”. Trainee in the same tune:…
I feel sad…
Reporter: How does it feel to become a millionaire? Millionaire: Sad, because I am not a billionaire.
He saw them without problems
God saw ur parents hungry, He created “Pizzas” God saw they are thirsty he created, “Pepsi” He saw them walking he created, “Car” He saw them without problems, “He created u”.
Sharab body ko khatam karti hai
Sharab body ko khatam karti hai, Sharab samaj ko khatam karti hai, Aao aaj iss sharab ko khatam karte hai, Ek bottal tum khatam karo ek hum khatam karte hai.
Rakhi mubarak ho
Khushbu aati hai phoolon ke taraf se. Rakhi mubarak ho aapki behen ke taraf se.
Plan For Future
Teacher asks children, what do u wish 2 do in future? Ram: I want 2 b a pilot. Vinod: I want 2 b a doctor. Deepa: I want 2 b a good mother. Ravi : I want 2 help Deepa.
Tamatar khao
Bhikari: Kuch khane ko do baba! Santa: Tamatar khao. Bhikari: Roti do baba! Santa: Tamatar khao! Bhikari: Chalo tamatar hi khila do! Santa ki wife: Yeh totle hai, keh rahe hai kamakar khao.
Itne kamjor hue teri judai se…
Arz kiya hai… Itne kamjor hue teri judai se… Gaur farmaiye… Itne kamjor hue teri judai se… Ki chinti bhi ab kheech le jaati hai charpai se!
Andheri raat thi
Andheri raat thi Wo meray saath thi Mai uss kai upper tha Wo mere neechay thi Tauba tuaba…… Aray logon kya samjhe aap Wo meri cycle thi…
Yash Johar is producing a new film
Yash Johar is producing a new film, And is searching 4 new talent. I’ve suggested ur name. Pls go & meet him. The movie’s name is “AKKAL HO NA HO”
Good morning kehne ke liye
Delhi – – Ke – – Pass – – Ke – – Nizamudin – – Railway station – – Ki – – Train no.6162 – – Ke – – Route – – Ke – – 3Rd – – Station – – Baratpur – – Ke – – Ek chote –…
Finger over the nail
Q: Why did the Santa put his finger over the nail when he was hammering? A: The noise gave him a headache.
Donkey is busy reading this SMS
The animals of a jungle have decided to hold a meeting. The lion has come, the tiger has come, the elephant has come, the monkey has come.. But The meeting hasn’t started. Guess why ? Because the Donkey is busy reading this SMS!
Stupid lawyer
Lawyer: “What is your relationship with the plaintiff?” Witness: “She is my daughter.” Lawyer: “Was she your daughter on February 13, 1979?”
Impact of Movies
Teacher :- Who is Mahatma Gandhi? Student:- He is the one who helped Munna Bhai to impress his girlfriend!
Did I do anything wrong?
Did I do anything wrong? Then why r U avoiding me? At least remember me once in a week. It’s really hurting me. With luv ur TOOTHBRUSH…
Post Office
Santa Singh: Can u spell a word that has more than 1000 letters in it? Banta Singh: Yes, Its Post office.
No matter how high the sky is
No matter how high the sky is, How deep the ocean is, How strong the wind is, How wide the river is, I just want to tell YOU…. They’re none of YOUR BUSINESS
Difference between Mother & Wife?
– What is the difference between Mother & Wife? – One woman brings U into this world crying… And the other ensures U continue to do so.
Note bheeg jayega
Munnabhai: Aey circuit note ke upar ke gandhiji hamesha muskurate hue kyun rehte hai? Circuit: Kyuki agar woh roo pade to note bheeg jayenge.
Farak nahi padhta
Petrol ke rate badhne par Santa bola: “Menu koi farak nahin penda. Pehle bhi 100 ka bharwata tha ab bhi 100 ka bharwata hoon.
Husband wife quarrel
After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, “You know, I was a fool when I married you.” The husband replied, “Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn’t notice.”
Best years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman
An inspirational speaker said: “Best years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman, who wasn’t my wife.” Audience was in shock and silence. He added: “She was my mother” A big round of applause & laughter! A very daring husband tried to crack this at home.…
Mere dil mein aaj kya hai
Mere dil mein aaj kya hai Wohi apne jo is dil mein pehle se hi the. Aur iss dil mein marte dam tak rahenge. Are main tumhare nahi Apne Tricuspid, Mitral, Pulmonary aur A-V valves k baat kar raha hoon..
You r just saying that 2 make me jealous
Lady 2 her maid: Oh Kanta, I hv reason to suspect that my husband is having an affair with his secretary. Kanta : I don’t believe it! you r just saying that 2 make me jealous!”
Top 30 Best & Latest Funny SMS collection
Funny SMS messages collection in English (New/Free/Short/Best)
