Sharab body ko khatam karti hai
Sharab body ko khatam karti hai, Sharab samaj ko khatam karti hai, Aao aaj iss sharab ko khatam karte hai, Ek bottal tum khatam karo ek hum khatam karte hai.
Rakhi mubarak ho
Khushbu aati hai phoolon ke taraf se. Rakhi mubarak ho aapki behen ke taraf se.
Plan For Future
Teacher asks children, what do u wish 2 do in future? Ram: I want 2 b a pilot. Vinod: I want 2 b a doctor. Deepa: I want 2 b a good mother. Ravi : I want 2 help Deepa.
Tamatar khao
Bhikari: Kuch khane ko do baba! Santa: Tamatar khao. Bhikari: Roti do baba! Santa: Tamatar khao! Bhikari: Chalo tamatar hi khila do! Santa ki wife: Yeh totle hai, keh rahe hai kamakar khao.
Itne kamjor hue teri judai se…
Arz kiya hai… Itne kamjor hue teri judai se… Gaur farmaiye… Itne kamjor hue teri judai se… Ki chinti bhi ab kheech le jaati hai charpai se!
Andheri raat thi
Andheri raat thi Wo meray saath thi Mai uss kai upper tha Wo mere neechay thi Tauba tuaba…… Aray logon kya samjhe aap Wo meri cycle thi…
Yash Johar is producing a new film
Yash Johar is producing a new film, And is searching 4 new talent. I’ve suggested ur name. Pls go & meet him. The movie’s name is “AKKAL HO NA HO”
Good morning kehne ke liye
Delhi – – Ke – – Pass – – Ke – – Nizamudin – – Railway station – – Ki – – Train no.6162 – – Ke – – Route – – Ke – – 3Rd – – Station – – Baratpur – – Ke – – Ek chote –…
Finger over the nail
Q: Why did the Santa put his finger over the nail when he was hammering? A: The noise gave him a headache.
Donkey is busy reading this SMS
The animals of a jungle have decided to hold a meeting. The lion has come, the tiger has come, the elephant has come, the monkey has come.. But The meeting hasn’t started. Guess why ? Because the Donkey is busy reading this SMS!
Stupid lawyer
Lawyer: “What is your relationship with the plaintiff?” Witness: “She is my daughter.” Lawyer: “Was she your daughter on February 13, 1979?”
Impact of Movies
Teacher :- Who is Mahatma Gandhi? Student:- He is the one who helped Munna Bhai to impress his girlfriend!
Did I do anything wrong?
Did I do anything wrong? Then why r U avoiding me? At least remember me once in a week. It’s really hurting me. With luv ur TOOTHBRUSH…
Post Office
Santa Singh: Can u spell a word that has more than 1000 letters in it? Banta Singh: Yes, Its Post office.
No matter how high the sky is
No matter how high the sky is, How deep the ocean is, How strong the wind is, How wide the river is, I just want to tell YOU…. They’re none of YOUR BUSINESS
Difference between Mother & Wife?
– What is the difference between Mother & Wife? – One woman brings U into this world crying… And the other ensures U continue to do so.
Note bheeg jayega
Munnabhai: Aey circuit note ke upar ke gandhiji hamesha muskurate hue kyun rehte hai? Circuit: Kyuki agar woh roo pade to note bheeg jayenge.
Farak nahi padhta
Petrol ke rate badhne par Santa bola: “Menu koi farak nahin penda. Pehle bhi 100 ka bharwata tha ab bhi 100 ka bharwata hoon.
Husband wife quarrel
After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, “You know, I was a fool when I married you.” The husband replied, “Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn’t notice.”
Best years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman
An inspirational speaker said: “Best years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman, who wasn’t my wife.” Audience was in shock and silence. He added: “She was my mother” A big round of applause & laughter! A very daring husband tried to crack this at home.…
Mere dil mein aaj kya hai
Mere dil mein aaj kya hai Wohi apne jo is dil mein pehle se hi the. Aur iss dil mein marte dam tak rahenge. Are main tumhare nahi Apne Tricuspid, Mitral, Pulmonary aur A-V valves k baat kar raha hoon..
You r just saying that 2 make me jealous
Lady 2 her maid: Oh Kanta, I hv reason to suspect that my husband is having an affair with his secretary. Kanta : I don’t believe it! you r just saying that 2 make me jealous!”
Cut off mu dog’s tail
Doctor cut off my dog’s tail. Vet: Why do u want to do that? Coz my mom-in-law is visiting us & I don’t want anything 2 make her think she’s welcomed.
No entry
Santa drives in to one-way & cross no entry board! Policeman: Oye no entry ka board nahi dekha? Santa: Mujhe laga film ka poster hai..
Teacher and Tommy
Teacher: What should be in a book to make it a bestseller? Tommy: A girl on the cover and no cover on the girl.
All girls are beautiful
All girls are beautiful, after the lights are switched off. – Shakespeare. All boys are innocent before the lights are off. – Shakespeare’s wife…
The people of Germany
Teacher : What are the people of Turkey called? Student : I don’t know. Teacher : They are called Turks, now what are the people of Germany called? Student : They are called Germs.
If you are very sad
If ever in your life U R very sad & lonely & feel that U have lost every thing, I will come, Hold your hand, take U 4 Walk on a Bridge & Show U where 2 jump From
You are already a sweet heart…
One who smokes gets a smoky heart, One who drinks gets an alcoholic heart, So dear, u must stop eating sweets, Coz you are already a sweet heart
I want devorce
Man: I want a divorce. My wife hasn’t spoken to me in six months. Lawyer: Better think it over. Wives like that are hard to get!
Category: Funny SMS
Funny SMS messages collection in English (New/Free/Short/Best)