Your own stupid
Today, tommorow and yesterday there will be … one heart that would always beat for you … You know Whose??? … your Own Stupid!!!
I want devorce
Man: I want a divorce. My wife hasn’t spoken to me in six months. Lawyer: Better think it over. Wives like that are hard to get!
Talking about oxygen
Life without u is impossible, u r in my breath and blood. i cant stay for a second without u, if u r not there i am dead oye hello i am talking about OXYGEN
Bond and a dog
Once james bond met a dog in jungle he said, “I am bond.!! JAMES BOND..!!” The dog bites him & replies, “I am kuttaa..!!!” “PAGAL KUTTA.!!”
Santa & Banta
Santa & Banta got tired of mobile & decide 2 use pigeons. One day a pigeon reaches Banta without message. Angry Banta calls Santa! Santa: Oye, this was a missed call.
People say Maths is boring..!!
Maths tells us three of the saddest love stories 🙁 : . . ¤Tangent lines who had one chance to meet and then parted forever. . . ¤Parallel lines who were never meant to meet. . . ¤And asymptotes who can get closer and closer but will never be together.…
Pappu: I Love A Girl..!!
Pappu: I Love A Girl..!! . Pinky: Oh, Who Is She.. ?? … . Pappu: She Looks A Bit Like You..!! . Pinky: Awwwwwww, Is It Me.. ?? ♥ . . . . Pappu: No, Its Your Sister..!! 😉 x) 😛 😀 >>> Had Ho Gayi !!!
Taste the thunder?
Zor ki baarish Makes me wonder Is this what they call, taste the thunder?
Find A Chick Whose Father Is Rich
A Young Man Asked A Rich Old Man: How He Made His Money ? The Old Guy Said: Son, It was 1932, The depth of the Great Depression I Was Down To My Last Nickel I Invested That In An Apple And Spent The Entire Day Polishing It; & At…
Husband and Wife galat fehmi
Wife : Kal raat tum neend main mujhe gaaliya de rahe the. Husband : Tumhe galat fehmi hui hai. Wife : Kaisi galat fehmi? Husband : Yehi k main soya hua tha.
Hum chaat par chade
Hum chaat par chade patang udane ke bahane, Wo bhi chaat par aayi kapde sukhane ke bahane, Uske mummy ne jo dekha ye hasi najara, Jhadu le aayi wo bandhar bhagane ke bahane.
Ek se mera kya hoga
Kiss is not like nokia… Connecting people Kiss is not like nike.. Just do it. Kiss is not like pepsi.. Yeh dil maange more But kiss is like pan parag.. Ek se mera kya hoga.
Kya haal hai
Santa and banta were walking on the road and a well shaped lady was walking in front of them: Santa: Kya maal hai yaar. Banta: Yaar, maal se yaad aya bhabhi ka kya haal hai?
What can you do for me
Girl : What can you do for me Boy : i would die for you Girl : I don’t like you Boy : Why? … Girl: I m looking for Someone who would live for me not Someone who would just die and leave me alone 🙁
A responsible man as a husband
Girl : I want a responsible man as a husband. Man replies : That’s me, whenever anyone is pregnant in my neighborhood, they say I’m responsible!
Ek SMS ki qeemat
Ek SMS ki qeemat tum kia jano kanjus babu? sab SMS k sir ka taj hota hay mera ek sms, sub k Mobile ki shan hota hay mera ek SMS, har kisi ki inbox ka khuwab hota hay mera ek SMS.
When I call you
When I call you: 1 ring means – I’m missing u, 2 ring means – I like u, 3 ring means – I’m thinking of u, 4 ring means – I need u, 5 ring means – Idiot phone utha.
Tum kya kisi bhoot se kam ho?
Aahat si koi aaye to, lagta hai ki tum ho Saaya sa koi mand raye to, lagta hai ki tum ho Ab batao tum kya kisi bhoot se kam ho?
He has two…
Always remember: When SHE cancels a date, it is because.. “SHE HAS TO” But When HE cancels a date, it is because.. “HE HAS TWO” 😉
i read ur sms
Whenever i want youe presence, I read ur sms Whenever I want to see you I close my eyes Whenever I want to hear your voice, I throw stone on dog!!’
Advantages of a housewife
Advantages of a House Wife: 1. No charges on washing, pressing of clothes, polishing of shoes per week 2. No TIP n Cooking n Serving charges per meal 3. House hold safety n No need for servants per month Conclusion: U CAN SAVE UPTO 17-18 THOUSAND EVERY MONTH IF U…
I do not sleep at night
In the morning I do not eat because I think of you, At noon I do not eat because I think of you, In the evening I do not eat because I think of you, At night I do not sleep because I am hungry.
Aisi ki taisi kab hoti hai?
Q: Aisi ki taisi kab hoti hai? – – – – – – – – – – Ans: Jab loose motion lage hon aur pajame ki gaanth na khule.
There’s trouble with the car
Preeto : There’s trouble with the car. It has water in the carburetor. Banta : Water in the carburetor? That’s ridiculous. Preeto : I tell you the car has water in the carburetor. Banta : You don’t even know what a carburetor is. I’ll check it out. Where’s the car?…
Why do men chase women?
Why do men chase women when they have no intention of marrying? – For the same reason dogs chase cars when they have no intention of driving.
Love is an illusion!
Love is an illusion! Its a highly dependency disorder of weak hearted people. . . . People with strong hearts believe in FLIRTING :p
IDIOMS RELOADED…
1. Money is not everything There are credit cards too. 2. Love animals They are tasty. 3. Save water Drink juices. 4. Study is healthy Leave it for sick. 5. Books are holy Dont touch them. 6. No noise in class You disturb those asleep. 7. Must get married Happiness…
A man to Santa
A man to Santa : Ur friend is kissing ur wife in ur home. Santa rushes home and came back within half an hour n slapped the man and said : He’s not my friend.
Category: Funny SMS
Funny SMS messages collection in English (New/Free/Short/Best)