Impact of Movies
Teacher :- Who is Mahatma Gandhi? Student:- He is the one who helped Munna Bhai to impress his girlfriend!
Did I do anything wrong?
Did I do anything wrong? Then why r U avoiding me? At least remember me once in a week. It’s really hurting me. With luv ur TOOTHBRUSH…
No matter how high the sky is
No matter how high the sky is, How deep the ocean is, How strong the wind is, How wide the river is, I just want to tell YOU…. They’re none of YOUR BUSINESS
Post Office
Santa Singh: Can u spell a word that has more than 1000 letters in it? Banta Singh: Yes, Its Post office.
Difference between Mother & Wife?
– What is the difference between Mother & Wife? – One woman brings U into this world crying… And the other ensures U continue to do so.
Note bheeg jayega
Munnabhai: Aey circuit note ke upar ke gandhiji hamesha muskurate hue kyun rehte hai? Circuit: Kyuki agar woh roo pade to note bheeg jayenge.
Farak nahi padhta
Petrol ke rate badhne par Santa bola: “Menu koi farak nahin penda. Pehle bhi 100 ka bharwata tha ab bhi 100 ka bharwata hoon.
Husband wife quarrel
After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, “You know, I was a fool when I married you.” The husband replied, “Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn’t notice.”
Best years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman
An inspirational speaker said: “Best years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman, who wasn’t my wife.” Audience was in shock and silence. He added: “She was my mother” A big round of applause & laughter! A very daring husband tried to crack this at home.…
Mere dil mein aaj kya hai
Mere dil mein aaj kya hai Wohi apne jo is dil mein pehle se hi the. Aur iss dil mein marte dam tak rahenge. Are main tumhare nahi Apne Tricuspid, Mitral, Pulmonary aur A-V valves k baat kar raha hoon..
You r just saying that 2 make me jealous
Lady 2 her maid: Oh Kanta, I hv reason to suspect that my husband is having an affair with his secretary. Kanta : I don’t believe it! you r just saying that 2 make me jealous!”
Cut off mu dog’s tail
Doctor cut off my dog’s tail. Vet: Why do u want to do that? Coz my mom-in-law is visiting us & I don’t want anything 2 make her think she’s welcomed.
No entry
Santa drives in to one-way & cross no entry board! Policeman: Oye no entry ka board nahi dekha? Santa: Mujhe laga film ka poster hai..
Teacher and Tommy
Teacher: What should be in a book to make it a bestseller? Tommy: A girl on the cover and no cover on the girl.
All girls are beautiful
All girls are beautiful, after the lights are switched off. – Shakespeare. All boys are innocent before the lights are off. – Shakespeare’s wife…
The people of Germany
Teacher : What are the people of Turkey called? Student : I don’t know. Teacher : They are called Turks, now what are the people of Germany called? Student : They are called Germs.
If you are very sad
If ever in your life U R very sad & lonely & feel that U have lost every thing, I will come, Hold your hand, take U 4 Walk on a Bridge & Show U where 2 jump From
You are already a sweet heart…
One who smokes gets a smoky heart, One who drinks gets an alcoholic heart, So dear, u must stop eating sweets, Coz you are already a sweet heart
Your own stupid
Today, tommorow and yesterday there will be … one heart that would always beat for you … You know Whose??? … your Own Stupid!!!
I want devorce
Man: I want a divorce. My wife hasn’t spoken to me in six months. Lawyer: Better think it over. Wives like that are hard to get!
Bond and a dog
Once james bond met a dog in jungle he said, “I am bond.!! JAMES BOND..!!” The dog bites him & replies, “I am kuttaa..!!!” “PAGAL KUTTA.!!”
Talking about oxygen
Life without u is impossible, u r in my breath and blood. i cant stay for a second without u, if u r not there i am dead oye hello i am talking about OXYGEN
People say Maths is boring..!!
Maths tells us three of the saddest love stories 🙁 : . . ¤Tangent lines who had one chance to meet and then parted forever. . . ¤Parallel lines who were never meant to meet. . . ¤And asymptotes who can get closer and closer but will never be together.…
Pappu: I Love A Girl..!!
Pappu: I Love A Girl..!! . Pinky: Oh, Who Is She.. ?? … . Pappu: She Looks A Bit Like You..!! . Pinky: Awwwwwww, Is It Me.. ?? ♥ . . . . Pappu: No, Its Your Sister..!! 😉 x) 😛 😀 >>> Had Ho Gayi !!!
Santa & Banta
Santa & Banta got tired of mobile & decide 2 use pigeons. One day a pigeon reaches Banta without message. Angry Banta calls Santa! Santa: Oye, this was a missed call.
Taste the thunder?
Zor ki baarish Makes me wonder Is this what they call, taste the thunder?
Find A Chick Whose Father Is Rich
A Young Man Asked A Rich Old Man: How He Made His Money ? The Old Guy Said: Son, It was 1932, The depth of the Great Depression I Was Down To My Last Nickel I Invested That In An Apple And Spent The Entire Day Polishing It; & At…
Husband and Wife galat fehmi
Wife : Kal raat tum neend main mujhe gaaliya de rahe the. Husband : Tumhe galat fehmi hui hai. Wife : Kaisi galat fehmi? Husband : Yehi k main soya hua tha.
Hum chaat par chade
Hum chaat par chade patang udane ke bahane, Wo bhi chaat par aayi kapde sukhane ke bahane, Uske mummy ne jo dekha ye hasi najara, Jhadu le aayi wo bandhar bhagane ke bahane.
Category: Funny SMS
Funny SMS messages collection in English (New/Free/Short/Best)