Main tere liye sab kuch chhod dungi
Girl: Main tere liye sab kuch chhod dungi. Boy:Maa baap Girl:Yes Boy:Bhai behan Girl:Yes Boy:Khana peena Girl:Yes Boy:Star plus Girl: Muh sambhal ke baat kar !!
Son’s math problem
Son: Dad 5+5, how much? Dad: You fool, You don’t know this, go and get a calculator.
Jab hum jiya karenge, apko yaad kiya karenge
Jab hum jiya karenge, apko yaad kiya karenge. Agar hum mar bhi gaye toh kya hoga ?? Daro mat hum yamraj ke mobile se apko SMS kiya karenge ..
Choosing career is like chosing wife
Choosing career is like chosing wife from 10 girlfriends, Even if u pick most beautiful, most intelligent, kindest woman, There’s still pain of loosing 9
Aap kaise soch sakte haiki
Ghantaghar tod dunga Ring road ko mod dunga Sahid gate fod dunga Titanic ko fevicolse jod dunga Aap kaise soch sakte haiki mai aap ko sms karna chod dunga
Sari phuljadiya yahi raheti hai
Child:Mom isbar hum saare patake is shop se lenge. Mom: lekin beta ye to girls hostel hai. Child: Papa to kehte hai ki sari phuljadiya yahi raheti hai.
Khaane mein kya hai?
Pati-Patni mein ladai ho gayi. Pati ghar se chala gaya. Raat ko phone karta hai. Pati: Khaane mein kya hai?? Patni: Zehar!! Pati: Tum khaa lena main der se aaunga..
When Heart fails..
When WORDS fail, eyes speak. When eyes fail,”HEART” speaks. When HEART fails, nothing speaks they put cotton in the nose…
There is an earthquake
Wife: There is an earthquake , house is trembling..& u r sleeping? Sardar: Why do u worry? U too better sleep. This is not our own house, after all rented house..
Vibration ka kamaal hai
Jab bhi tumhara msg aata hai Hamara room room machal jata hai Aang aang mein gudgudi hota hai Yeh tumhara sms ka kasoor nahi hai Yeh toh mobile ki vibration ka kamaal hai
Santa’s Slam book
SLAM BOOK filled by Santa. 1.Strength: My wife,Jeeto. 2.Weakness: Banta’ s wife,Preeto. 3.Oppurtunity: When Banta is on tour. 4.Threat: When I m on tour.
If I post this letter tonight
Customer : If I post this letter tonight, will it get to Delhi in two days time? Post Master : Yes sir, it definitely will. Customer : I bet you, it won’t. Post Master : Why not? Customer : It’s addressed to Mumbai.
Connecting pipal
Q: Agar do pipal ke Pedon ko ek rassi se bandh diya jaye toh us rassi ko kya kahenge? A: Uss rassi ko bolengey NOKIA – Connecting pipal.
Life style Menu
Life style Menu may welcome, Menu hai: CALL ke liye 1 dabaiye ENGAGEMENT k liye 2 dabaiye SHAADI k liye 3 dabaiye Or DOOSRI BIWI k liye pehli ka gala dabaiye.
A Guy picks up a girl…
A Guy picks up a girl for the date. Why are u wearing ur belt around ur knee..? Girl: I promised my mom that I wouldn’t let you touch me below my belt.
Pant kis ki hai
Maths Teacher To Santa: If You Had 1000Rs in Your Pocket And 1000Rs In Other Pocket, What would u think ? Santa:Yeh pant kis ki hai?
Timi lai kiss
Nepali ma machha english ma fish, Sabai lai muksan timi lai kiss.
Jhak marte the kya…
Galileo used 2 study in small lamp, Graham bell used 2 study in candle, shakespear used 2 study in stret lite. Mujhe samaj mein nahi aata.. sale din mein jakh marte the kya?
You are genius…
I still remember the day I sent an SmS 2 u saying “Sender is cool and reader is fool” U got angry and replied “Sender is fool and reader is cool” You are genius…
Brain works until u fall in luv
Da human brain is most outstanding thing – it functions 24hrs 365 days, right from da time u r born until u fall in luv.
Bahut maar padi thi
Basanti : Ek baat batani hai, par please muje marna nahi. Veeru: Bolo. Basanti: Main Pregnant hoon! Veeru: It’s a very good News. Basanti : Shadi se pehle pitaji ko bataya tha toh bahut maar padi thi.
Doctor’s prescription 4 u
A cute little smile 4 breakfast. More laughs 4 lunch. Lots of happiness for dinner. Doctor’s fee? An sms when u r free.
All Women Are…
Funny quote on a Married guy T-Shirt All Women Are Devils & I Married Their Queen;- >
Speak in english please
Lady to Dr : Mera beta motorcycle se gir gaya. Dr. : I don’t know hindi, please talk in English. Lady : Sir I no speak English. Dr. : Try please. Lady: My londa gironda from hero honda.
Aaj se tu mera bhai hai
Ladka bola ……. Dilruba Ladki boli ……. Pizza khila Ladka bola ……. Paise nahi Ladki boli ……. Aise nahi Ladka bola ……. Mahngai hai Ladki boli ……. Aaj se tu mera bhai hai.
Main padhta nahi
Imtehan sar par khade hai aur main padhta nahi, Janabe manjil nazdik hai magar main chadhta nahi, Jee chahta hai saari padhai-likhi chhod du, scale pen tod du, Aur yun jo phirten hai shahar ke awara unse nata jod lu, Teacheron ke lecture mein ab maza aata nahi, Issiliye ghar…
Humne uski doli sajai hai
Usne haathon per mehendi lagai hai, Humne uski doli sajai hai, Hamein pata tha woh bewafa niklegi Isliye humne uski choti behen ko bhi phasaya hai !!!
A difference between a Kiss, a Car and a Monkey?
What is a difference between a Kiss, a Car and a Monkey? A kiss is so dear, a car is too dear and a monkey is U dear.
Sandle badi bhari thi
Woh aankh badi pyaari thi, Jo humne usse mari thi, Woh sandle badi bhari thi, Jo usne hume mari thi, Muft mein hi pit gaye yaar, Hume toh aankh ki bimari thi.
Gayab kaise hua
1 Mara hua aadmi, Ghar se gayab, Kaise hua? – – – – – – – Janneke liye dekhiye, – – – – – – – C.I.D.
Category: Funny SMS
Funny SMS messages collection in English (New/Free/Short/Best)