Ek se Dus…
Teacher K.G class ke bachhe se Ek se Dus tak gino, main aapko KISS karungi. Baccha: 1 se 100 tak ginu toh kya package available hai !!
6 Inch ka hai
6 Inch ka hai – – Size normal hai – – Mazboot hai – – Zyadaa mota bhi nahi hai. – – 2 Larkiyan dekh chuki hain – – Lena hai toh bolo? – – Full time masti – – Non stop fun Mera – – LG kg195 Moblie.
Kahi dekha hai
A fool looks in miror & thinks: Isko kahi dekha hai! After a while he remembers: Yeh toh wahi kamina hai jo meri shadi ki album mein meri biwi ke saath khada hai!
Santa & Banta
Santa & banta sit in a coffee house… 1st: “Jaldi pee yaar, coffee thandi ho jayegi” 2nd: To kya? 1st: Arre Bevkoof, menu card padha!!! HOT COFFEE Rs.20/- & COLD COFFEE Rs.40/-
Kursi nahi hai
Husband apni biwi ke office gaya toh usne dekha ke uski biwi boss ki godi mein baithi dictation le rahi thi. Husband: Chalo aajao, aisi jagah kaam nahi karna jahan staff k liye kursi bhi na ho.
Machchhar ki kasam
Purani haweli ke band pade kamre ki dhool bhari tasveer ke peeche lage jaale me fasi makdi ki poonchpar baithe machchhar ki kasam, I MISS U!
He was dead
Lawyer: “And what did he do then?” Witness: “He came home, and next morning he was dead.” Lawyer: “So when he woke up the next morning he was dead?”
Aaj Light Khana hai!
Q:Why Santa is standing below the Tube light with an open mouth. A: Because Doctor has advised him: ‘Aaj Light Khana hai!’
Sab do din ke masti hai
Apne husn par itna guroor na kar Sab do din ke masti hai Tera husn bhi tab tak hay kayam Jab tak fair & lovely sasti hay
SMS karke paap karta hun
Mandir mein jap karta hun, Masjid mein addab karta hun, Insaan se kabhi bhagwan na ban jaun, Isliye roj tumko SMS karke paap karta Hun.
Yeh kya hai
Father Asked Him: Yeh kya hai? Santa Replies: Teacher ke paas stars khatam ho gaye thay iss liye unhone mujhe aande de diye.
Yeh to Ayodhya mil gaya
Santa dials a number. A girl receives the call. Santa: Who r u? Girl: Seeta here. Santa: Maine to Chandigarh phone kiya tha, yeh to Ayodhya mil gaya
Milk and orange juice
John: What food u feed ur new born baby? Beautiful Young Mom: Breast milk & orange juice. John: Oh my… Which side is orange juice?
Death
Lawyer: “Now, Mrs. Johnson, how was your first marriage terminated?” Witness: “By death.” Lawyer: “And by whose death was it terminated?”
Don’t play with my life
Try 2 understand n don’t disturb me more. Leave me alone. Last night I didn’t sleep thinking of u. So don’t play with my life. – Sardar says 2 mosquito.
What upset you?
Lawyer: “What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke that morning?” Witness: “He said, ‘Where am I, Cathy?’” Lawyer: “And why did that upset you?” Witness: “My name is Susan.”
Ulte latka do
Inspector to Santa: Phaansi se pehle, bata teri aakhri ichha kya hai? Santa: Mere pair upar aur shir neeche kar ke faansi de do!
Oye! higher studies yaar
Pathan sitting on the top of the mountain and studying. When a person asked what he was doing? He replied, Oye! higher studies yaar.
Serve without dressing
Preeto comes nude in front of the guests while serving the halwa. Banta shouts: Whatâ?Ts this? Preeto: Recipe book me likha tha “Serve hot without dressing.”
Roses are red
Before Marriage: Roses Are Red, Sky Is Blue, Oh My Darling I Love You. After Marriage: Roses Are Dead, I have Flu, You Are My Headache I Will Kill You…
Mere papa bahut darpok hain
Santa child – mere papa bahut darpok hain. Banta child – how? Santa child – jab bhi road cross karten hain, meri ungli pakad lete hain !
Who is lecturer
Teacher to student: Can you define who is lecturer? Student : A lecturer is a person who has a very bad habit of speaking when someone is sleeping.
Lo ab apni behan se mazak bhi nhi kr skte kya….?
Boy: Chalti hai kya 9 se 12….? * Girl: Chal…..:) * Boy: Kahan….???? … * Girl: Principal ke paas….. * Boy: Lo ab apni behan se mazak bhi nhi kr skte kya….? * Girl: Bewakuf Chutti mangne…. 😀
Report card
Santa went to school for getting the report card of his son. Santa: Madam report kab dengi aap. Teacher: Period khatam hone tak to intezzar karo.
Great boxer
Great boxer said, Sometimes words are not enough . . . . . A punch is necessary 😛
Practice makes man
Practice makes man prefect:), Den wat about Women???? … any guesses???? She is born perfect,,, . . . . . . . . . . . Moral: moral voral kuch nahi, Bas ladkiyon ko Accha lage,,,,,, Isi liye post kar diya 😀 🙂
Shakespeare Said
Shakespeare Said If There is a Single Dollar in Your Pocket Then . . . . . . . . . Convert it Into Pakistani Currency & Buy a Pepsi of Rs. 65 Te 20 Rupy De Pakore v Le Lena.:)))
Girlzs b4 going 2 party.
Girlzs b4 going 2 party…. Facial Bleach Waxing Hair …Curlin Threading Scrubing Moisturising done &puts on Lipstik Lipgloss Lipliner Perfume Body toner Body lotion Eye liner Eye shadow Eye maskara Foundation Face powder Rings Bracelets Neckless Nail paint Nail shadow and Says- “Yar, jald baazi me kuch kia hi ni,…
Aakhri khahish
Judge: Aakhri khahish batao? Mujrim: Apki Beti se Shadi, 1 Mobile Nokia N73, 5 Karor Rupy, U.S.A ka VIZA, 2 Saal ka Haneymoon, 6,7 Bache jo aap ko Nana or muje Papa kahen, Or main un sab ki shadi karwa dun, us k baad aap jo Fesla do Mujhe Manzor…
Girls and boys in Exam
7 Things Girls Do In an Exam Hall: 1. Write 2. Tuck Hair Behind Ears 3. Again Write 4. Chnge d Empty Refill 5. Again Write 6. Ask for Extra Sheet 7. Again Keep Writing Seven things Boys do in an Exam Hall: 1. Count d No of Girls 2.…
Top 30 Best & Latest Hindi Funny SMS collection
Hindi Funny SMS
