Kabhi gola kabhi bum
Osama to big B: How are you?? Big B: Bas kabhi khushi kabhi gham. And you? Osama: Bas kabhi gola kabhi bum.
tum barey ho k kia karo gey!
Teacher: tum barey ho k kia karo gay? Student: shadi T: maira matlab hay kya banogay? S: Dulha T:I mean bary ho k kia hasil karo gay? S: dulhan T: Idiot! maira matlab bary ho k ammi abbu k lye kia karo gay? S: bahu laon ga T: Stupid tumhary…
Usama asked Kajol,
Usama asked Kajol,”how’s ur life?” She replied,”kabhi khushi kabhi ghum.” Then Kajol asked Usama,”what about U?” He replied,”kabhi BUSH kabhi BOMB.”
Maine kaha dilruba
Maine kaha dilruba, Usne kaha paise dikha, Maine kaha paise nahi, Usne kaha aise nahi, Maine kaha mehengai hai, Usne kaha ja tu mera bhai hai.
Sardar chicken
A Sardar went 2 hotel, ordered chiken and waiter comes with the order. Sardar: Murgi di taang kithe hai? Waiter: Woh langra tha. Sardar: Dil? Waiter: Dil murgi le gayee. Sardar: Dimaag? Waiter: Murga sardar tha..
Horror movie dekha
Husband: Raat ko main ne aik horror movie dekha, aik churail kabhi mere agay kabhi peechy or kabhi saath chal rahi thi. Wife: Kaun si movie thi??? Husband: apni shaadi ki..
Exam ke saath cheat hai
Padai ke saath refreshment hai Exam ke saath cheat hai Aur har acchi ladki ke saath Yah to Uska bhai yah to koi boy friend hai.
A law permit
Q: Why doesn’t law permit a man to marry a second woman? A: Because as per law you cannot be punished twice for the same offense!
Don’t take any chances
Man receives telegram: Wife dead-should be buried or cremated? Man: Don’t take any chances. Burn the body and bury the ash.
Aare o sambha!
Gabbar: Aare o sambha! yeh sms padhnewala insaan hai ki bandar? Samba: Sarkar agar reply kare toh insaan nahi toh bandar.
Way of Transferring
– There is a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. – It’s called marriage.
Today is our anniversary
– Wife: Darling today is our anniversary, what should we do? – Husband: Let us stand in silence for 2 minutes.
In the exam hall
Examiner : Why you wrote the formula in your hand. Student : Because my teacher told, “Formulas must be in finger tips”.
Where do you want to go on our anniversary?
I asked my wife, “Where do you want to go on our anniversary?” She said, “Somewhere I have never been!” I told her, “How about the kitchen?”
Hum apne underwear sukhaate hain
Jaani… Jin toofanon mein logon ke aashiyane udd jaate hain, Unn toofanon mein hum apne underwear sukhaate hain.
God made U and is called Cartoon.
God made a daylight n is called Sun, God made a entertatemaint n is called Fun, God made a nightlight n is called Moon, God made U and is called Cartoon.
Where do you want to go on our anniversary?
I asked my wife, “Where do you want to go on our anniversary?” She said, “Somewhere I have never been!” I told her, “How about the kitchen?”
Hamara bhi bank balance hota
Tajmahal ko dekh kar bola, shahjahan ka pota: Aaj hamara bhi bank balance hota agar dada diwana na hota
All about marriage
Ek American nai ek Swami se bola, Hamare yaha shaadi e-mail se bhi hoti hai. Is par Swami bola kamal hai, Hamare yaha to sirf female se hoti hai.
Examiner bhi pass karne ko majbur ho jaye.
Likhu to paigam kuch aisa likhu ki, Kalam bhi rone ko majbur ho jaye. Har lafz mein dard itna bhar do ki, Examiner bhi pass karne ko majbur ho jaye.
Weight kitna hai
Dr: Apka weight kitna hai? Patient: Chashme ke sath 75 kgs. Dr: Aur bina chashme ke? Patient: Woh bina chasme ke toh mujhe dikhta hi nahi.
Hazaron ka kya hoga?
Ladki Boli: Chandni chaand se hoti hai, sitaron se nahi, Mohabbat ek se hoti hai, hazaaron se nahi. Ladka Bola : Chandni agar chaand se hogi to sitaron ka kya hoga, Mohabbat agar ek se hogi to hazaron ka kya hoga.
Chand mat kahiye
Laloo – Rabri tum meri CHAND ho Rabri – Na ji hamko CHAND-VAND mat kahiye, Yeh sasura America wale roz chand par chadhte hai.
Utrega kaise?
Khud ko kar buland itna Key Himalay ki choti pe jaa pahunche Aur Log tujh say puchhe Abe gadhe, ab utrega kaise
Yeh student ki pehchan ha
Yeh student ki pehchan hai Haath mein cigratte mu mein pan hai Mashoor yeh shaitan hai Yeh student ki pehchan hai Parhna isey aata nahi Class kabhi jata nahi Canteen iss ki jaan hai Yeh student ki pehchan hai Jalson mein sab se aage hain Naron mein sab se aagey…
Reaction of girls
Reaction of girls when they loose their purse: Poor girls: My money! Rich girls: My debit card! Beautiful girl: O shit! us mein “Sayeed” ki photo thi!
Mile tujhe ek smart si Dulhan
Teri zindagi mein kabhi ghum na ho Teri aankhe kabhi gam na ho Meri dua hai ke mile tujhe ek smart si dulhan Jiska wieght 150 Kg. se Kam na ho!
Kuch nahi hua tha
Year 1963 – – – Aug 3rd – – – Evening, 07:48 – – – Uss waqt kuch nahi hua tha. Chalo apna kaam karo! Sara din sms padte rahte ho!!
Sab se pehele kiss karo
Sab se pehele kiss karo Bister par leta do Phir dono tange uper utha kar Niche haath laga kar dekho Bachhene ne susu kiya hai ya nahi.
Dost tu bhi sms likha kar
Dost tu bhi sms likha kar tera bhi naam ho jayega. Jab tujh par pheken ge log ande aur tamatar toh sham ki sabzi ka intezam ho jayega!
Category: Hindi Funny SMS
Hindi Funny SMS